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Down and Dirty Reviews: Colecovision -- A - Z

It's a shame this system only lasted two short years. People really seem to remember all the different games here so here are bunch of reviews to help you weed out the losers. There are 20 here altogether so far. All reviews are by the StarSoldier unless noted.

The overall scores are out of 100.

The graphics, sounds, and game play are out of 10.


SCORE / NAME
59 ANTARCTIC ADVENTURE (Konami, 1983)
Antarctic Adventure is a first generation 3D action game where you control a constantly running penguin. It is your mission here to guide this cute little dude across several different icy countries in record time while avoiding pits and annoying seals. It sounds stupid and the game isn't too hard either but it comes with some above average cartoon-like looks and fun easy to get into game play. This is a fun if a too simple game but at least it looks just the obscure arcade game as well.
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 7
sound: 5
gameplay: 4

Look for ANTARCTIC ADVENTURE on eBay here!

32 BC QUEST FOR TIRES II: Grog's Revenge
In this odd game you help a caveman on a single wheel unicycle to not to die in the harsh prehistoric environments. It's very hard to tell what's even going in some of the screens so it can be difficult to tell what can and can not kill you in this unusual video game here.
*Uncommon Colecovision game
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 5
sound: 3
gameplay: 5
Look for BC Quest for Tires II on eBay here!

37 BUMP N' JUMP (Coleco, 1983)

In this odd arcade racer here you have the ability to jump in your doom buggy here if you want while you race down some busy streets filled with other vehicles that don't seem to like you. Bump N' Jump is a very simple overhead racer that unfortunately gets very repetitive only after a few plays and the controls are not the most responsive either which could lead to your death a lot.
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 3
sound: 3
gameplay: 3

Look for BUMP N' JUMP on eBay here!


65 BURGERTIME (Coleco, 1983)

This very difficult yet easy to learn game here lets you help a chef to create giant burgers by walking on the different ingredients (yuck) but beware of the evil walking eggs and sausages that want to stop you. The problem is there are several different enemies on the screen at once so good luck making it far in this hard game here. Burgertime has very colourful visuals and even that comical music is still here but is a very simple action game that gets old very quickly because your doing the same thing for each level. Burgertime can be a little tough to control but the game is more satisfying then eating the crap at McDonalds.
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 5
sound: 5
gameplay: 4

Look for BURGERTIME on eBay here!

39 COSMIC AVERAGER
This is a very weak shooter that just seems to goes on forever and ever. It is kind of cool when you can bomb and shoot at the same time though much like Konami's arcade game Scramble but that's it for cool game play here in this very choppy and way too colourful shooter here.
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 4
sound: 2
gameplay: 4

Look for COSMIC AVERAGER on eBay here!

02 DAM BUSTERS
I really hate these 3D shooters and this is one of the worst I ever played. Althoungh creating a deep military action game sounds like a great idea, the black void backgrounds are pretty absolutely boring and the game lacks any real action either.
*Uncommon Colecovision game
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 2
sound: 1
gameplay: 1

Look for DAM BUSTERS on eBay here!

50 DONKEY KONG (Coleco/Nintendo, 1982)
Despite all the hype surrounding this title it's still a not so great arcade translation of the popular Nintendo hit and I don't know why this was the official ColecoVision pack in game? In DK here you help a man named Mario risk his life through 3 different levels to get his girlfriend back from a giant ape known as Donkey Kong. Sure, this looks way better than the Intellivision and Atari 2600 DK games but some of the animations are still missing and the levels are edited differently too making them less fun. The Atari 7800 and NES versions are better although they are not arcade perfect either. The game ends up being strictly average.
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 5
sound: 3
gameplay: 4
Look for DONKEY KONG on eBay here!

70 DONKEY KONG JUNIOR (Coleco/Nintendo, 1983)

If you don't know the story here; in this cool sequel you actually control Donkey Kong's son on a rescue mission to save his dad from the the former hero of the original DK, Mario himself. Like Donkey Kong for the Colecovision this game may have some of the best graphics for its era and the controls are not too bad either but DK Jr. also has some weird edits as well. Why is the Donkey Kong rescue mission the second level for example? The game is a lot of fun though and it is easily one of the better action games for the system.
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 6
sound: 5
gameplay: 6

Look for DONKEY KONG JR. on eBay here!

The Starsoldier Game of the Month!
75 FROGGER (Parker Brothers/Sega/Konami, 1983)

This is a great version of the road crossing, home searching arcade hit. It even has the cool classic music included and not even the Super Nintendo version has that bouncy soundtrack and if you don't like the music then the game lets you turn it off with a simple key press. Frogger is a must for any Colecovision owner and it even doesn't have that annoying Coleco load up screen.
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 5
sound: 7
gameplay: 6

Look for FROGGER on eBay here!

61 GORF (Coleco/Bally Midway, 1983)

Gorf may look like your average space shoot em up where you fight invading aliens but this game has several different scenarios to separate itself from the pack. For example; in one scene you get to shoot aliens in Space Invaders-like formations and then once that's done that you get to move on to stronger attackers with killer lasers and faster speeds. You can even try to shoot down a giant starcraft too. Gorf is either too fast or too slow in the game play department so you may not get that intense arcade experience found in other CV games.
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 6
sound: 6
gameplay: 6

Look for GORF on eBay here!

56 LADY BUG (Universal, 1982)
You can't get the real Pac Man for Colecovision (unless you find a fan made cartridge) but at least you can get this bug based maze game instead. I don't like the many trap doors here and the action can get a little too quick at times but I can live with it.
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 5
sound: 5
gameplay: 4

Look for LADY BUG on eBay here!

21 LOOPING
So what's the point of this stupid and very choppy shooting game anyway? In the game here you control a plane with the ability to flip through the air but even the controls here are quite bad and that's never a good thing for a pure shooter game. Looping is definitely another black eye for Colecovision owners.
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 2
sound: 2
gameplay: 2

Look for LOOPING on eBay here!

63 MOUSE TRAP (Exidy, 1982)
This is one of the better version of a Pac Man clone. You guide a hungry mouse through deadly corridors with menacing cats waiting to attack. Your little mouse isn't helpless as you can open and close three coloured doors at will to escape the cats plus if you have any dog biscuit's then the mouse turns into a dog to chase the cats for a change. It's not as good as Pac Man because of the game play is too demanding but for many it's still the next best thing.
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 4
sound: 4
gameplay: 6

Look for MOUSE TRAP on eBay here!

40 MR. DO (Universal, 1983)
Mr. Do is a little slow but it's still a merely ok version of the arcade game where you help a clown collect cherries and shoot down enemies. One of the biggest problems with this translation is that the controls are quite stiff.
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 4
sound: 4
gameplay: 5

Look for MR. DO on eBay here!
SECOND OPINION!
I thought Mr. Do was HORRIBLE on Colecovision. The music was WRONG, Mr. Do was WRONG, and they changed the rules of the game. "Get Ready Player 1?" What's that?
-Darryl
3/31/01

73 Q BERT (Parker Brothers, 1982)

Parker Brothers may no longer be in the video game business but they sure made some of the greatest games for the Colecovision, eh? Take Q Bert on the system for example; one of the best translations of this fun arcade classic. Has the strange orange creature Q Bert you must hop around a blocky pyramid in order to change the colours on the panels while avoiding pesky enemies like hopping monsters and giant snakes. Change all the colours on the blocks and you finish the level. Although it was disapointing that Q Bert didn't have eyes and there isn't any background music either, still the game is so simple enough for anyone to pick up and play plus the controls are perfect with the CV controller here. It's easy to get addicted to this one.
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 6
sound: 5
gameplay: 3

Look for Q BERT on eBay here!

84
ROOT BEER TAPPER (Coleco/Midway, 1983)
In this cool fast paced game you actually help a bartender serve up of glasses on Root Beer (it was just Beer when it was in some arcades and bars by the way) to your many tristy customers. Although the game may appear easy at first, you have to worry about collecting empty glasses and customers from reaching the end of the bar or they will throw you out there altogether. This is a tough but very original game with bonus levels and distractions like cheerleaders help break up the contrant drink tossing. Root Beer Tapper can be very addictive only after a few plays. I'll tell you when I had enough!
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 7
sound: 7
gameplay: 7

Look for ROOT BEER TAPPER on eBay here!

41 SMURF Rescue in Gargamel's Castle (Wallace Berrie & Co., 1982)
Just has the name implies you play has a Smurf (a tiny human-like creature who is completely blue) on a rescue mission to find Smurfette (the girl Smurf). Smurf is a good looking game (for Colecovision standards anyways) with some colourful backgrounds but you basically just jump over obstacles, avoid stuff and repeat. That's it for game play here unfortunately.
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 6
sound: 5
gameplay: 3

Look for SMURF on eBay here!

71 SPY HUNTER (Coleco/Midway, 1983)

The popular overhead driving game about a spy in a highly advance sports car (or boat) comes to the colecovision here too and surprisingly it isn't too bad. In the game you shoot down rival cars and motobikes with a unlimted round of machine gun bullets while cool Peter Gunn music plays in the background. You can even pick up bonus items like oil and missiles to you against tougher enemies as well. Although the graphics are underwhelming, the game is still very playable.

For 1 player only
graphics: 5
sound: 7
gameplay: 7

Look for SPY HUNTER on eBay here!

57 VENTURE (Coleco/Exidy, 1982)
Venture is a fun overhead adventure game on the Colecovision but I wish the controls were better but half the blame goes to the flawed controllers. You play has the warrior Winky (yes, his name is Winky) and you're armed with a bow and arrow to fight against the many enemies that guard the plentiful treasures across three dangerous lands. Although the graphics and sounds are ugly, this is a fun game that's slightly superior to the Atari 2600 version.
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 4
sound: 4
gameplay: 6

Look for VENTURE on eBay here!

51 ZAXXON (Coleco/Sega, 1982)
The legendary 3/4 point shooter of skill and action is translated well on the Colecovision but it's not really arcade perfect because of the choppy on screen scrolling. If you are new to Zaxxon it's a isometric shoot em up where you control both the latitude and altitude to survive a dangerous group of enemies and locations. Although the sharp graphics were nice, I really didn't like how the game was a little too easy and so repetitive either. Shouldn't a good game should get progressively harder here?
For 1 or 2 players
graphics: 5
sound: 3
gameplay: 6

Look for ZAXXON on eBay here!

-All the reviews here are written by the StarSoldier unless noted.

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